Originally published December 22, 2022
You know how lots of people get all excited about the holidays, put up their Christmas tree right after Thanksgiving, get all of their shopping done early, play Christmas music non-stop through the month of December?
Yeah. I am so not one of them.
I would go so far as to call myself a holiday grinch. The weight of the expectations from this season is just too much for me. While I try to embrace the fun of it with my daughters, I’m not sure I will ever fully embrace December as a “joyful season”.
That said, one thing I do really enjoy about December is the anticipation of what’s to come in the following year. I don’t typically buy into the whole New Year’s Resolutions thing, but I do appreciate the transition from one year to the next as an opportunity to reflect on what went well over the past year, and what I’d like to be different moving forward.
So today, I’d like to share with you one exercise that I just did myself, just this morning. I asked myself one question, dropping for a moment all logic and reality of my current situation and allowed myself to really imagine no limitations. Here’s the question:
What would it look like for you to feel fully supported in every area of your life?
For me, I divided this into just a few categories:
Home
Business
Health
The Dog
(I intentionally left family, kids, relationships off of this list because I was approaching it from the standpoint of “who could I hire to support my needs” perspective. But it is also totally legit to ask the question of “what do I need to feel fully supported in my relationships?” That just isn’t the question I was asking myself here…)
Anyway, I think it’s important for this exercise to really suspend reality for a moment here, and let your imagination dream a little bit. For example, hiring a private chef isn’t really a financial reality for me right now, but it absolutely went on my list under the “home” category. As did a personal assistant, home organizer, laundry person, and housecleaner. I ended-up with similar unrealistic lists under the “health” and “business” categories, full of services that aren’t quite in my budget right now.
But that’s okay. In fact, it’s sort of the point.
By giving our imagination the freedom to allow in possibilities that we otherwise keep the doors closed to, we create space for play (at least, mental play) and creation and “what if’s”. And just by allowing that door to open for a moment, to imagine things that could make our lives better, we put ourselves a step closer to actually incorporating these elements into our “real” lives.
Despite the voice in our very logical heads asking: “But how?”
Or: “But there’s no way I’m gonna be able to afford all of that this year! Why should I dream of things that aren’t even possible??”
Well, let’s now take a step back from the actual support items/services on the list, and take a look at what they represent to us. Let’s imagine you WERE able to hire all of the support that’s on your dream list - what would that enable for you? Why is it important to you? What does “fully supported” really mean to you?
For me, I looked at my list and noted that the support/services I listed represented a few core desires for what I want my life to look like:
Time freedom
Open, organized spaces
Exploring out in the open world
Feeling strong, confident, and energetic
Flow in my work and daily activities
Impact from my actions
Presence (not being distracted by everything that needs to be done)
Learning & experimenting
By reflecting on the support we want from a more zoomed-out perspective, we can identify some key qualities for what we want our lives to look like. Try to come up with just a few words that represent commonalities between the elements on your list. (For me personally, I’m longing for spaciousness, strength, and presence – but everyone’s desired qualities are obviously going to look different!)
With this awareness of key qualities we’re longing for, we can incorporate decisions, actions, etc. into our daily life that are centered around these ideals. (For example, knowing that spaciousness is a key longing for me right now, I can look for ways to ensure that I have open blocks in my daily schedule, or I can make a commitment to getting rid of some of the extra “stuff” in my house.) What I love about this zooming-out exercise is that finding small ways to bring in more of the qualities that we want in our lives feels much more achievable, doesn’t it (than, say, hiring a private chef tomorrow)?
Plus, it’s possible that some of the support/services we have on our lists actually ARE possible right now, if we give ourselves permission to allow that support into our lives. If that’s the case, go for it! You deserve all the support you dream of so that you are able to bring more of your true self and personal genius out to create impact in the world.
Wishing all the best for you as we move forward into the coming year!
P.S. If you’re longing for support around making changes in your life to find more fulfillment and impact, book a free introductory conversation call! (https://calendly.com/sequeltoaphd/intro_conversation) We can talk about where you’re getting stuck and how I might be able to help. Totally informal, no commitment. I’d love to hear from you!
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